Let's Talk About: Over- Delivering > Over - Sacrificing.
Hello Reckless Optimists,
There’s a moment when it hits you:
You didn’t just go the extra mile.
You became it.
YEP. The silent tax of over-delivering, the one most of us high performers pay in invisible currency.
At first, it felt good.
You were being generous. Thoughtful. Dedicated. Impressive.
You showed up. You carried the load. You went all in.
And somewhere along the way—
You built a baseline no one asked for, but everyone expects.
Not because they're entitled, but because you trained them.
You started overdelivering.
And overdelivering slowly became over-sacrificing.
The parts of yourself you gave away quietly?
The hours, the energy, the ideas, the resources invested, the emotional labor?
They were invisible.
Parts of you became invisible.
Even the people closest to you don’t fully understand what it’s cost.
Even if they say they do, they don’t.
Not really.
And so, finally, because there always comes a finally—
You pull back.
You draw a line.
You say no. You stand up for yourself
Because your body, your sanity, your family, your LIFE is asking for it.
And suddenly…
You’re the problem.
“She’s changed.”
“She’s different now.”
Let’s be clear: You’re not selfish.
You’re just done abandoning yourself.
You're done be ok with disrespect and disregard.
You're ok letting people down and you're prioritizing yourself.
You will feel like the villain. And you will be the villain to some.
But you are doing exactly what you need to be.
Over-giving gets real cozy next to Over-Delivering—
But one fills you up.
The other empties you.
One builds Trust.
One Builds a Cage.
AS someone waking up to the cage I had built for myself, this season -
IT'S ON OUR TERMS RECKLESS OPTIMISTS!!!!
5 Signs You’re Not Just Overdelivering, You’re Over-giving
1. You get praised for being “so reliable”, but feel quietly disposable.
They love that you always show up. But do they know you? Or just what you do for them?
2. You say yes out loud, while your body screams no.
The nod, the smile, the calendar block… all while your chest tightens and your energy flatlines.
3. You resent the weight, but fear what will happen if you put it down.
You imagine the group, the team, the family falling apart.
You forget that maybe they should’ve been carrying more all along.
4. You start to flinch at being asked for “just one more thing.”
Because you already gave ten. And no one noticed.
And you’re not even mad at them...you’re mad you trained them to expect it.
5. You fantasize about disappearing, not to be dramatic, but just to rest.
You wonder who would check in, who would show up, who would even notice…
And the answer makes you ache.
How to Start Reclaiming Yourself:
1. Stop trying to “exit gracefully.”
There’s no perfect script. Someone will misread your silence, your no, your boundary. Let them. Your job is to be clear. Not palatable.
2. Catch the micro-moments.
Notice when you say yes but feel it in your chest. That clench? That’s your system saying “this isn’t it.” You don’t have to fix it all, just catch it.
3. Try giving… less polish.
Not every email needs to be overthought. Not every meeting needs your emotional labor. Not every “thank you” needs an exclamation point. Start small. Just be... less available for performance.
4. Swap guilt for grief.
It’s not guilt that shows up when you pull back, it’s grief. Grief that you’ve built relationships on overextension. That you taught people what to expect by giving more than you had. That’s okay. Let yourself grieve it, then grow from it.
5. Practice tiny acts of self-return.
Not self-care. Self-return.
Choose something you want—not something you’re obligated to want. Eat alone. Close the tab. Go on DND. Walk without your phone. Choose you in micro-moments, until it stops feeling radical.
This one hit home? Forward it to your inner circle.
The ones who’ve overdelivered for years.
The ones carrying more than they let on.
The ones who need to hear: You’re allowed to stop.
DID SOMEONE SAY SUMMER SUPPER SERIES????????
I DID. IT WAS ME!!!
Welcome to The Reckless Table fam!
Let's break bread and break norms!
Look out next week for an email from us on dates! Locations! Norms were gonna break! Glass ceilings! Unrealistic Expectations! When "Yay, I did it" turned into "Finally, I'm less behind" YEAH NO!
2026 retreats are coming. Please stop yelling at me. JK I love when you do that. Enthusiasm is my love language!
TALK SOON!!!!!!